As a mother of a child gripped by addiction there might seem to be only two options. One, the most natural, is to jump in and rescue; the other is to cut yourself off, to demonise the person you love. I’ve tried both and I can tell you, neither of them works.
At my lowest point I spotted a poster for REBOUND in my GP’s surgery. The group, which is Portsmouth based, helped me to step back and see the difference between supporting my daughter, and enabling her addiction to continue.
It also helped me to realise that if you jump into the well, thinking you can rescue your loved one from drowning, at best all you will do is enable them to carry on; at worst you end up drowning with them. Cutting yourself off doesn’t work either – you end up living your life as if it is inhabited by a ghost.
REBOUND linked me into Portsmouth Users Self Help (PUSH) group who ran a relationships course which gave a unique opportunity for mothers, fathers, sons and daughters, to get up close and personal; it offered us all an opportunity to face our demons.
I then joined the recovery brokers’ course run by PUSH and this gave me a far greater understanding of addiction and how we can all be susceptible.
My daughter is now back home and embarking on a detoxification and rehabilitation programme. Although it’s impossible to predict the future, I feel stronger in my own ability to cope. I want to make people who are affected by addiction aware that recovery is possible, and help remove the stigma about addiction in our community.
If you are affected by a loved one’s addiction you can contact REBOUND on 07833
If you are affected by addiction you can contact Cranstoun on 023 9275 1617 for confidential advice and support.